3 months

so it's been 3 months already living my new healthy lifestyle.  things are going great so far.  this past week, i didn't have cheat meals but instead a couple small cheap desserts on the weekend (egees and 1.5 godiva chocolates...so yum!).  i took pictures on the 23rd which is my actual ann date.  i was disappointed to tell you the truth! i really was feeling great about myself and then i looked at the pictures and i didn't know why i looked so horrible.  i know we are all harder on ourselves than we should be but when you're putting in the work like i have been, i expected to look like i do in person in pictures. i showed some of my girlfriends and they definitely see changes.  i want the end product so bad still that it just sucks.  put in the effort and you will (eventually) get the results you want.  it's just going to take me longer i think.

i am only weighing myself at the very least every 2 weeks but i'm going to try to only weigh myself on my ann date.  the scale doesn't mean shit to me anymore...just a curiosity thing. since i'm gaining muscle, i'm not going to lose weight in which seeing the scale makes me sad!

i am way stronger now though.  i benched 65 lbs yesterday 3 sets of 12.  i still hate pull ups with a passion.  it's really my only hated exercise so far.  i just don't understand how i'm strong in all aspects except for that, haha.  i'm squatting 95lbs right now 3 sets of 12.  i'm hoping to up it to 110 by my 4th month!!

i took my measurements today to see if i would feel better overall instead of looking at the pictures.  it helped!

waist: -2.25 in
bust: -1 in
butt: -1.5 in
hips: -3 in
each thigh: -1 in
calves: the same. they went down and then back up with muscle
biceps: -.25 in

keeping my head high and working my body to the max to get fit!

SO proud of myself

yesterday, i had a 15 hour day.  it included 3 jobs for the first 13 hours and then i went and worked out afterwards!!!  yes, i actually stayed committed and didn't just go home because i "had a long day".  i will not get to my goals that way.  i also turned down fatty goodness the past two days as well.  chocolate covered macadamia nuts have been in the frig at work...whattttttt?!? and i didn't even eat ONE! days like yesterday make me super believe in myself that i can get through this shit and be in the best shape of my life by the end of the year.  yesterday, i also squats 50 lbs with the bar for a total of 95 lbs 3 sets of 12 reps.  it really is amazing when you put your mind to it and really work at a goal. 

i'm starting to really love myself again!

Quest Bars

ARE THE MOST AMAZING THING EVERRRRRRR!!!!

omg i am so in love! they are delish and fabulous for you!  for those of you on ww, they are less points than a candy bar which normal protein/granola bars are the same believe it or not.  these are great and you can do so much with them.  people will eat them straight, slice them and bake them into little chips, break them apart and put them into yogurt, blend them into your protein shakes, there are just SO many different options!  tons of females do not get enough protein and why not have extra tasting delicious!

BUY SOME!

http://www.vitacost.com/productResults.aspx?NttSR=1&ss=1&x=-854&y=-45&ntk=products&Ntt=quest%20bars

Feeling Good!

yesterday while at the gym, i noticed a few things:

- a couple girls kept looking at me while i was lifting.  i feel like you're definitely making a difference if you're getting stare downs from the ladies!
- a good amount of men were looking at me as well
- i was lifting hardcore and it felt great and super tough!  i left the gym feeling very accomplished.

now these things may be superficial and exterior, but it tells me this: i AM making progress!!!!  you can't always feel your progress and you can get down on yourself from it.  this was a wake up call for me that i need to keep at it even more.  i may not be anywhere close to how fit i want to be, but no matter what, i am in better shape than i was prior.  that's all that matters.  one day at a time.  constantly thinking about it. i'm all in.

Whoa it's been forever!!!

i almost forgot about my blog!  a lot has been going on and life has been changing.  that has to happen for things to get better right?!? so the real new is that i'm 2.5 months into getting my ass in shape and FIT!!  eventually i'll be able to post some pictures but for now it's still embarrassing that i let myself get to the point i was at.

things i have learned so far on my journey:

• do it for yourself. of course you always have your family in mind to make it a better family lifestyle but when it comes down to it, you have to want it for you.
• want it enough for yourself.  you are worth the effort and worth being happy
• get something that makes you excited/motivated to workout...such as workout shirts for myself :)
• just get your ass in the front door of the gym.  the rest will just come as long as you go!
• no one ever regrets a workout....even the smallest workout is way better than nothing at all!
• you DO have the time to workout, you just have to sacrifice somethings that aren't as important such as the newest abc family series!
• speaking of abc family...stop dvr'ing as many shows! that way when you're home and "bored because there is nothing on tv", you will go to the gym or go on a walk
• it's okay to have a bad day at the gym or at home.  you may have not done what you wanted or expected from yourself, but at least you tried.  failure is not trying and giving up.  you'll have a way better day tomorrow.  after all, you can't have amazing days 365/366 days of the year!
• remember that the slower the weight/fat comes off, the greater the chance you have of it not returning.
• trust the process....i freaking hate this saying because i'm not at the point where i can see my gains and full out trust it.  but i'm positive one day i will be saying this as well.  
• keep faith in yourself!